Beware the Godless Afterlife!

Ever since I was a kid I have been preoccupied with things like death, the afterlife, aliens, ufos, physics, cosmology, the mind, human psychology, religion, racism, and many other ism's, some of which are perfunctory none-sense.

So the other night I was watching Joe Rogan's new Comedy Central stand-up special and enjoyed it quite a bit. Joe seems to always be involved in some form of entertainment that I have had an affinity for, like stand-up comedy (he does it, I watch him do it), sitcoms (again, I watch and he appeared regularly on News Radio in the 1990's), weird TV shows like Fear Factor and Joe Rogan Questions Everything, as well as having an awesome gig calling fights for the UFC (MMA being the only sport I kind-of sort-of still give a crap about).

So leave it to Joe to intellectualize a bit during his comedy special and address some of the weird truths about life on planet earth and the incredible ways we meat-monkeys justify our preposterous existence. I'll paraphrase him here but at one point he said something like "we live on a giant ball floating in space spinning at thousands of miles per hour revolving around a giant fireball a million times larger than the earth. We need the sun for survival but it is trying to give us cancer, but if it goes away we get sad and if we stare at it we'll go blind. And, according to Joe, "Nobody is fucking talking about it!"

Bravo Joe! Which brings me to my point. If that amount of craziness is happening right in our own celestial backyard then what could possibly be happening elsewhere in an infinite universe?

And since we know we don't know (we have barely more than an f-ing clue), why do we insist on pretending that we do?

Listen people, I don't care what you do or do not believe in, but there are no non-religious people on the planet (scientists and democrats included). Oh, you can call yourself an atheist, because you believe that the universe just popped into existence from nothing (which is, as I understand it, a mathematical impossibility), but disbelieving a being that might exist and might have created the universe and everything in it simply puts you in a different category of religion. You and your kinfolk are just part of a different club whose members simply espouse similarly unprovable beliefs (and drink the same flavored Kool Aid). Besides, don't you think that if there is a God it could outsmart you?

But you see, this so called "God" that maybe doesn't exist might exist because there is no evidence of its non-existence, just a lack of material evidence to support the human claims of its existence, which for most atheists what would qualify as acceptable evidence would be if the Feds paraded Jesus down Main Street in shackles. But they'd then have to prove not only that he was (is?) Jesus but also that he died and was resurrected and would be required to do so with carbon-dated samples of his flesh (which I believe has not yet been done on a living being yet), both pre- and post-Crucifixion mind you (cause you gotta believe something changed during the exchange).

But you see, it probably doesn't matter which Grand Poobah you choose to bow down to (or not), because the real likelihood is that we're all going to have to permanently lose mortal consciousness in order to find out what the truth is.

Frankly, I don't care if L. Ron Hubbard is your god of choice, just don't shove your beliefs in my face (or down my recently severed neck). Who knows, if the human race survives another 2000 years LRH may yet ascend to that most exalted throne of messiah anyway. Hell, maybe LRH was Jesus, and his second coming came and went without notice (and perhaps was done as such in jest, assuming the good Lord has a sense of humor). Of course, if LRH was Jesus then Stephen Hawking has gotta be be the Antichrist (Immobilized for his sins, of course)!

I do have a theory about what's really going on in this here universe of ours, however I am saving it for a forthcoming novel. But for a moment forget Heaven, Hell, Hollywood and Halal, and let's focus on eternity (and no, I am not responsible for your universe).

Just think about an afterlife, God or no god, but an afterlife where the manner in which you lived your Earth-bound existence was going to determine what your life in eternity will be like. I mean, it sure must be easier to do bad things during our mortal lives if we believe we're just going to end up as piles of dirt, or that a bunch of hot chicks are going to meet you there and they only have eyes (and other body parts) for you, so long as you killed enough innocent people during your earthly existence. How differently would we all behave if we knew, really knew, that the way we lived our lives would be reflected upon you adversely if you were bad or positively if you were good for all eternity?

Would you continue on your current path or would you tweak things a little, so when you get there, wherever "there" is, you don't end up on the receiving end of that head-severing machete, over and over and over again, "To Infinity and Beyond!"

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